The Great Indian Debate Show



Every evening, half a dozen clattery twerps appear on our tv screen and squabble over an issue sensationalized by the TRP whore media of my country. My father is a die-hard fan of this form of digital harassment. He listens attentively as those dickheads clobber each other and make a horlicks of what ideally should have been a systematic and peaceful exchange of conflicting ideas.

The format of all Indian debate shows is somewhat like this. The channel gathers spokespersons from different political parties and makes them sit together. That’s enough for triggering an explosive argument, add to that the constant fueling up by the anchor, who is the biggest asshole on the panel. I don’t know why the hell there are so many people in the show. The whole screen looks like a collection of pixels, where the faces are so small that identifying the speaker is almost impossible. 

The subjects are usually petty, often a stupid comment passed by a moron grey haired politician who believes women should stop eating Maggie in order to prevent rape. The crowd consists of a ruling party spokesperson and a representative of the opposition, who yell at each other for the entire length of the show. What they say is hardly relevant to the topic and more centered towards personal grudges. The entire debate is going to be carried on by these two, the rest of the panel have a ghostly existence. 

Some people don’t even get the chance to open their mouth. They sit in their chair and raise their hands when they want to make a point in a civilized manner. However, the anchor doesn’t give a fuck about their opinions. He wants TRP. He wants noise. In the end, they either remain unheard or butt in with an amplified intensity, only to make things worse. 

Then, there are usually two kinds of women in the panel – 1. Who are loud, and 2. Who talk sense. 

Then, the guy from minority community. Doesn’t matter what the topic is, he’ll always play the victim card. 

Then, retards. 

Then, the anchor. This guy should be given a golden award casted in the shape of a dick. He should have been a moderator, but he thrusts opinions at people, yells at them and accuses them without any base and doesn’t let them speak. It’s like sitting in BN Thakur sir’s class, where your freedom was under the man’s bootsole. 

By the time the program reaches its conclusion, the scene is a mayhem. All you hear is babble. Nothing makes sense. 

I stuff my ears with earpods and walk out of my house when it’s unbearable. If these shows are banned, I tell you, hypertension will disappear from India. 

Author: ravish raj

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5 thoughts on “The Great Indian Debate Show”

      1. Ha good one lol our media is like the Jerry Springer show lol its.. a liberal host, with a conservative guest, or a conservative host, with a liberal guest, idk about in India, but here, conservatives like myself, go together with liberals, and vice versa, like peanut butter and rotten eggs.. we don’t lol so if you put those 2 kinds of people within 5 miles of each other, much less the same show, someone (liberals) are going to be very upset at the end lol

        Liked by 1 person

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