Love, Desire and Obsession : Main Phir Bhi Tumko Chahunga


Realeased merely a week ago, the latest song from the upcoming movie Half Girlfriend has already become the love anthem of 2017. Garnering more than 10 million views in a short span, it is on the way to hit 20 and even more. The comments section is billowing with praise for Arijit Singh and Mithoon, and for the song itself, which is the voice of thousands of people who have fallen in love, some time, somewhere. 

So what is it that makes Main Phir Bhi Tumko Chahunga such an emotional roller coaster? 

The title translates into Ill still love you. This phrase is the core message of love; it’s the voice of everyone who’s loved, despite the consequences. It fits as well in the case of requited love as that of unrequited love. This is the message that reiterates in every love story, across all the borders and all the time.

The story of Half Girlfriend  (novel) revolves around a Bihari guy, Madhav, who’s obsessed (yeah, we are good at obsessing, I can vouch for that) with Riya Somani, who doesn’t want a boyfriend, due to her own insecurities. But she doesn’t want to lose Madhav either, as he’s the only living being she feels safe with. So she offers Madhav a strange compromise – she agrees to be her half girlfriend. Half girlfriend, as both the novel and the trailer describe, is a term difficult to define but easy to understand. It’s somewhat more than friendship, but MINUS SEX. It’s really excruciating to survive in this cruel compromise, and yet Madhav agrees, and that’s when the major conflict starts. 

The song begins with 

Tum mere ho…is pal mere ho..

Kal shayad ye aalam na rahe…

Kuch aisa ho tum tum na raho…

Kuch aisa ho hum hum na rahe…

Ye raste alag ho jayen…

Chalte chalte hum kho jayen…

Main phir bhi tumko chahunga… (4)

Is chahat me mar jaunga…

(You’re mine…in this moment you’re mine…

Maybe tomorrow won’t be the same…

Maybe you won’t be you anymore…

Maybe I won’t be me anymore…

Maybe our paths will fork away…

Maybe we’ll get lost walking…

I’ll still love you.. (4)

I’ll die loving you… )

The insecurity in the song, the fear of an unpleasant tomorrow echoes throughout the novel. The moments are fragile, the happiness is short lived, and the separation is imminent. The seperation is always there, no matter how close they are. There’s this invisible boundary, marked with Riya’s insecurities and lack of trust, and Madhav’s every attempt to get closer only tosses him miles back, from where he has to find Riya all over again. This happens at four major points in the novel. 

One, when they make the deal. His proposal is accepted in bits, and madhav finds himself in a maze, from where he doesn’t understand Riya anymore. 

Then, two, when he rudely asks her to fuck him or fuck off. Hormones! Riya leaves him and he is devastated. Here’s another moment of separation, the tomorrow the first stanza of the song is talking about, about the time when they won’t be the same persons to each other. 

Three, when Riya leaves him that heartwrenching letter, thus turning him into a wrecked heap again. Everything was so great, and all of a sudden, it’s the end of everything. Just like that, Madhav is tossed back to square zero!

Four, when he finds out that Riya is alive, and she is somewhere on this planet. And he runs out to find her, not knowing whether it’s worth it.  

All these points culminate into this heartbreaking uncertainty, where the only thing tangible and alive is the present. There’s seperation, there’s the havoc of time, there’s this fear that they might grow apart, turn into personalities they weren’t. There’s a sea of unfortunate mishappenings, but no matter what happens, Madhav will still love Riya. 

The obsession, though it doesn’t work well in real life, carries an important message. 

Do not stop hoping. 

The composition is brilliant, the lyrics are beautiful, and the voice is soothing and moving. Arijit has made the song a perfect melody for all the romantics. 

Check it out. 

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